Daily WOW

We're not sure what to make of this. For sure, we were expecting bombs and threats. In fact, our office's block had been held in a lockdown due to the potential danger brought on by the box. And for sure, there was no doubt that box came from the rampant mascots.

But what we got instead surprised us.

182 days 

Daily WOW

Due to a mysterious package that arrived in our head offices this morning, all reporters have turned their efforts into opening the box. The situation is a dangerous one so we hope readers understand the urgence of this unfortunate occurrence. We will let you know what is in the box the moment it is opened, if deemed safe.

183 days 

Meanwhile, we suggest that you check out migatree.cc.cc to purchase wonderful items such as this Miga carabiner. All proceeds will go towards emergency debts incurred by this event.

Daily WOW

BOS (Bank of Sumi) security cameras caught this picture last night when the sasquatch was attempting to rob the bank. It had rolled in fire retardant and was crossing the fire safes (Safes guarded constantly by walls of flame that can only be turned off by officials) when the fire alarm went off as the sasquatch crossed into the business section of the building. He had disabled the security, worn gloves, and a mask, but sadly, he was not saved by the bell.

However, proving that they are the sneaky creatures that they are, the sasquatch made a successful escape by burning a hole through the back wall and running away.

183 days 

Daily WOW

Quoted from the front page of newspaper around Canada: 

"Attention! All Quatchi hunters are strongly advised this public service announcement:

We have found the source of the discolored sasquatches. The surveillance camera of Sumistore caught a sasquatch pilfering a tube of firestop last night. Furthermore, outdoor cameras caught the sasquatch in action as he doused himself with it and then proceeded to change color. Within minutes, he light a fire, jumped within it, emerged intact, put the fire out, and ran into the lightless streets." 

The following photos accompanies the article:

184 days 

Daily WOW

Ems found this scandalous picture when she woke up. Immediately suspicious, she investigated the photo and noticed that there seemed to be another figure cut off with the edge of a paper also visible. Using advanced techniques and SPIKE technology, she was able to retrieve the entire photo from the doctored one, both of which is shown below.

184 days

Daily WOW

After waking up with a particularly distressing dream, a fellow citizen came up with his digital composite of his vision: 

Our reporters couldn't quite pick up what he was saying as the phones were having trouble with static, but it sounded like "I have psychic flowers." 

185 days 

Daily WOW

Our editors today were rushing to put our lastest book onto the market so there was a delay in our news department. Here it is:

Based on the recent Sasquatch sighting in Sumistore, our reporters have gathered and researched evidence and condensed it into a 100 page book, titled "13 Ways to Capture Sasquatches" Each chapter provides informative and descriptive ways to notice, lure, and capture sasquatches around Canada. Hot off the press, they are expected to be snapped up immediately, and more than half have already disappeared through pre order, so order yours now and begin your own sasquatch hunt. Remember, you're contributing to a bigger cause by helping us hunt down these unknowable creatures.

186 days

Daily WOW

In order to draw Quatchies into the open, a popular opinion polling company has opened a national poll. Scientists say that Quatchies are friendly creatures, so they would be sure to join.

Canditate 1# of the Smiliest Contest

Sure enough, a quatchi joined: 

Then so did several more: 

But the last two deflated rather than buoyed our hope: (Both have become property of the police and taken out of the contest in order to avoid unnecessary scaring of children.)

Evidence 1#: How there be so many Quatchies in a place? And clearly they are being baked. They seem to exhibit greater survival skills than we previously thought.

Evidence 2#: This one worried us the most. If quatchies can change color, then we can no longer depend on simply identifying them by their medium brown color.

187 days 

Daily WOW- More queerness at Sumistore

Late last night, reports came in to Migatree and the police came in to close Sumistore. Apparently a furtive ball of fur was found rolling along like a ninja between isles. Witnesses have been described as being distraught and or faint. One fortunate witness was able to get a picture before it fled. However, the photo is of low quality: 

courtesy of D.K.K.

On the contrary, the second picture we received was of much better quality. Even more strange is that the sasquatch seems to be posing for the camera. If this does not worry you, then might want to get your mind checked. Sumistore offers excellent healthcare at their pharmacy.

From Anonymous

 188 days

Sumistore

Complaints were abound yesterday at Sumistore. The store, which had just brought in a few expensive  new products on sale this week, saw the products fly off the shelves. Rushing to replace their stock, Sumistore's sale assistance said that the manager made a deal with the first offer he could. The next morning, shoppers came and complained that while the food did not taste appalling-in fact, some remark that it was better-they noticed something strange about their food after it was prepared.

189 days

Montage

It's time to celebrate the almost-monthly anniversary of Migatree!!
190 days

Daily WOWOWOWOWOWOWOW preview

This movie is so raved about we have to just show you the link to prevent your computer from heating up in excitement(by the way it's just a preview): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXZZ3SVkaH0&feature=youtu.be

Daily WOW

Miga was nearly arrested yesterday when he picked up a lost Starbucks card. The owner had $.23 left on his card and refused to relinquish it because "he was living on every last penny." Miga countered "Finders keepers, losers weepers". A brawl ensued with the card flying in the air and falling into a gutter. Miga and the owner went home to play WOW and to Starbucks respectively. Starbucks was available for comment and said that once a card is lost, they cannot replace it. 

Nobody thought to contact the city hall and have the grate removed in order to reach the card.

Miga smiling proudly with his card, before it disappeared in a macabre twist of fate.

191 days

Daily WOW-Tricky sumis!

A photographer thought he had cornered a sumi on a rock, snapping this picture, before the unthinkable happened. The sumi flipped backwards off the rock in a spectacular dive and the water. Quickly the sumi disappeared as the photographer was wearing expensive articles of clothing that he did not want wet.

The photographer had thought he'd get his sumi for sure since there was no flying space. Unfortunately, in his shock, he reached forward with his camera and fell into the water as well. His companion was able to take one last shot of the sumi and his friend before the water washed them both away. When he was finally rescued and able to give a quote, he moaned, "A furry feathery monster stuck his tongue out at me! What does that make me?"
His companion says that he tried reaching for the feather that the sumi left behind but just as his fingers were closing around it a puff of wind knocked it away with a sound that he swore was laughter.

192 days

Daily WOW

Using our new Superior Photo Initiating Key Equipment, we were able to capture a sumi in flight. However, since the GPS system is still being developed, the location of the photo is uncertain. 

Our Superior Photo Initiating Key Equipment, or SPIKE, mounted in a trained seagull.

If anybody recognizes the location of this photo, we ask that they please step forward and educate our reporters.
We hope this recent acquisition will help further the mystery of these rampant mascots.

193 days

Daily WOW-quatchi sighting?

There he is-or isn't he? 

Late last night, a video was slipped into our mailbox with one half hanging out. As a result, when we reached it this morning, half of the tape had been soaked in dew, and rendered immediate problems when we tried to play it. Only through expert recovery procedures was the film saved. Nonetheless, we are deeply indebted to the filmer as we were able to confirm our suspicious with this still: 

The owner of the video had not, indeed, been lying about the fact that he had captured a quatchi on video. However, where is he? We have deduced that the Quatchi lives somewhere in the forest in semi-cold climates due to the species of trees, and that the pollution there must be devastating as some of the trees are off colour.

 The video that is being released to the masses is of low quality, and may be a disappointment to quatchi hunters:

DAILY WOW IS BACK

D was seen bribing Miga with FREE smarties today! Some say "pics or it didn't happen" so here's the proof:

We hope you find this as scandalous as we do!!!

SCAMMER!!

Miga

Daily WOW

A passerby today noticed what looked like an old bus ticket and, being a good citizen, reached down to recycle it. However, upon inspecting it closely, the citizen realized that it was not a crumpled piece of paper and was indeed, a very wrinkly photo. Interest piqued, he or she (the entire procedure was done anonymously) ironed it out and sent it to the police,who then sent it to us:

  

It's the first photo we've had of the vagrant mascots and the detectives are hard at work pin down their locale. Though we've sent messages to the mascots that we come in peace they refuse to come out from hiding. Perhaps they think that being dirtied and destroyed is better than being imprisoned safely in-store.

195 days

LOCKDOWN!!

A lockdown that lasted four hours was reported to have ensued at the local school!
E brings in the breaking news as D was too noob enjoying heated up food in the comforts of home.

E and the rest of the school were startled during their lunch time studying by a sharp call from a teacher, and promptly all the students in the proximity rushed into the nearest classroom without knowing why. Excited and then alarmed, the students weren't sure if it was a prank or surprise event or something more serious than that. E thought it was a chemistry party (dream on...) The reality, however, quickly began to assert itself as the teacher announced that we had entered a "code red". Though nobody was sure what that entailed, its importance was evidence as authority moved with lightning speed to tape up the doors and close the blinds. Students even moved to close the windows behind the closed blinds in an anxious precaution against any "bullets that could fly our way". Jokingly, they sat and awaited the news. They didn't have to wait long. Soon their suspicions were confirmed when twitter messages flooded in loaded with surrealistic pictures of tanks and armed men. Suspended above the pictures, or worse, bleakly unadorned for the mind to distort until it seemed their likenesses were floating right in front of them in the air, were words like "SWAT" and "machine guns". Alarmed, they sat tight anxiously waiting for more news crowded around the few electronic devices. Their only consolation was that they were sitting with their friends. Time seemed to pass slowly as more and more funny-worried messages and phone calls failed to clarify the situation. Finally, for what seemed like an hour after they were shoved into the classrooms, in tensions that weren't taut but getting there, the situation was revealed. A man with a firearm was posing a danger to society but not in the school and the dire mood was lifted.
Funny messages that helped lightened the disbelieving mood:
"didn't appreciate my counsellor shoving me under the desk"
"this student walked past the police and they threatened their gun on him" (yeah right)
E never saw the tanks or police hiding behind them or the snipers in person. Perhaps it's for the better. She did see, however, the K9 unit, and was escorted by police into busses that were awaiting the 1300 children of the school in order to be evacuated to safety.
All in all, it was disbelieving, scary, then exciting and finally very quickly boring as fack. As there was no release time specified, all sat in a state of anxious waiting to be freed from the unreal and unmoving situation. At the end of it all wanted more info and food but it seems to be a slow negotiation to safety (as one person remarked..."everything in movies happen so fast".)
Also a point of interest is that a student from another school was invited by a member of this school today and had to endure the lockdown. We're sure that went over well in the guy's mind. Next time, we'll hide our guns and placate stereotype-believing people with our cow poop bombs instead.

Daily WOW-transformation of a sumi

Why the sudden disappearance? Witnesses have realized the complexity of the situation as they have found Sumi's disappearing from their very eyes. One moment, they're in full colour; the next, they might as well have become  a part of the surroundings.
Because of this helpers of the cause to get the mascots under control have started taking pictures in black and white. See if this helps.
196 days

Daily WOW-The Hunt Continues

Another instance of hide and seek was reported to our headquarters this morning as the sun was rising. The shimmery sunlight seemed to fabricate a sumi somewhere in the distance on the sidewalk. The witness quickly took a photo but even in the optimally exposed photo the Sumi is faint. 

Later, when the witness looked back up after peering through the lens the sumi was gone, without a trace, vanished into the thin air where an airplane was droning coolly in the background.

197 days

Daily WOW

Customers were pleasantly surprised to find that their sushi had changed overnight when customers of Soyummy received their orders yesterday morning. Soyummy Sushi, which had been in business for five years, revealed a new brand of sushi last night that they named "soomshi".  Customers say that this new brand of sushi tastes lighter, sweeter, and more soyummy than before. There was no forewarning of this change.

At the time of the surprise sushi, patrons recall that the area had been decorated with multicoloured balloons in various shades of green and brown, presumably to imitate the colour of seaweed and soysauce. No other information is known except that business is expected to be as usual this week, so don't hesitate to order your "soomshi" platter now.

 198 days

Daily WOW aka Where Have All the Mascots Gone?

Following the recent mascot truck scandal, the world has been speculating where these helpless creatures could have hidden themselves. The angry truck owner in particular would like to seek these vagrants out. Though the mascots are all either endangered or mythical animals, no protection program has been put forth to protect these misfits. 

The following duet of photos were slid into our mailbox last night. They seem to be of the same location, but at different times of the day. We sent reporters the identified scene but found nothing, not even a Sumi feather.

198 days

The best thing ever

Note: This is a guest post by Sumi

Daily WOW

A large white plumbing truck was seen driving sporadically on the highway yesterday.

It had driven through seven red lights and over the solid double yellow lines ten times. 

Police were about to arrest the driver of the truck, but the driver was just too agile.

Finally, yesterday, the police found the truck parked in a driveway. The family that lives there deny any knowledge of the driver of the truck. It had, the son said, arrived as if by magic this morning.

When the police searched the truck, there was no evidence to be seen--save for a freshly printed photo tucked neatly into the glove compartment: 

And scrawled on the back was: Thanks for the truck!

199 days

Daily WOW

A sasquatch was seen today hopping onto public transit systems around the lower mainland.

He was holding a suitcase and wind breaker and looked to be going skiing, as he was wearing ski goggles, though where we couldn't guess. Witnesses say he was in a hurry, but didn't really seem to know where he was going. And he sure spent a lot of his time looking at bus time tables.

 

Our sources don't know where he's going. All we've got to go in is that he seemed to be going to his Aunt Atica's. 

*note: the pronoun 'he' here is used speculatively. As of now our sources are still unsure of the gender of the hairy monster.

200 days

Daily WOW

It was late evening when the mysterious event happened, the event that shook the lives of those it touched for many years to come.

The mystery came in the form of a white box.

It was delivered by a white car, and tied with a white ribbon, to a white house, with no return address to be seen.

On its top was scrawled a curious character that resembled nothing that the long history of the neighbourhood could recall. Other than that, there was little else to distinguish the box from any other box on a lawn on a late Thursday evening.

Because the family decided to leave it until the time seemed right to open it, it became the local attraction. The box was very well behaved, sitting just like a prized pet. Somebody even noticed that it was postmarked. Sure, someone speculated, it arrived rather late, but it didn't mean the contents inside were spoiled.

Since it had waited so long to come here, speculated another, one might as well wait a little longer.

For what?

Nothing in particular.
Strangers would come and leave as friends as they shook, weighed, and kicked the box like a ball to test its contents. It weighed as much as a feather and didn't rattle when kicked, to the disappointment of the children. And everybody agreed it was about as wide and tall as a child.

But when the people opened it, there was no need to speculate any longer.

Since then, anytime somebody has peeked into the box, they leave with a smile on their face, feeling as light as a feather.

201 days-feeling the pressure yet bro?!

Daily WOW?

In a new study released from @##@##$$@$, we were able to confirm that sasquatches are, indeed, living. In fact, we found them around supermarkets and cafes, eating what we eat. Just a lot more. 

CASE: QUATCHI 

 FILE: BRUNCH

In fact, there really wasn't anything human the Sasquatch wouldn't eat...except this: He said it reminded him too much of himself.

So the next time you're at the supermarket...be on the lookout, and you just might see a spikey, furry human-like animal pulling down a box of cereal bars...

or sipping on a latte with an appreciate smile to a server's disbelief.

CASE TWO: SUMI

FILE: EATING HABITS

Now the existence of thunderbirds is still a debate.

If they truly did exist, how come they don't leave a footprint on the earth?

We were bestowed with the rare opportunity to communicate with one.

Research: Hello Sumi. What sorts of things do you eat?

Sumi: Nothing. I simply enjoy watching other plants photosynthesize while I soak up the sun myself. 

The report ends there.

202 days